The House
Posted: Wed Mar 15, 2017 9:37 pmHe sat down at the kitchen table and looked around at the room. He relived the memories in this house as he ate his shrimp and caviar and drank his bottled water. Satisfied, he arose and walked slowly into the dining room where he dipped shrimp into the caviar and proceeded to stuff it into each end of the hollow curtain rod. He went from room to room repeating the process until the shrimp was gone. Finally he went to the front door where he turned to take his last look into the house before leaving and locking the door. If only his wife had loved him, he thought, before heading to the lawyer's office to turn over his key.
The next day his wife entered the house with her new boyfriend, anxious to start her new life. At first everything seemed wonderful but within days an odour began to permeate the air. They rented a steam cleaner and cleaned all the rugs, but the odour got worse. They scrubbed, then painted every wall, even hired an exterminator to fumigate the house and search all the vents and the attic for dead rodents. Nothing seemed to help alleviate the problem and as the odour got worse and worse they decided they would have to sell the house and move. After weeks of seeing potential buyers being offended by the smell, and in spite of reducing the asking price multiple times they decided they had no alternative but to take out a new mortgage for a new house at great expense.
The husband, upon hearing this news told his lawyer that he had always been fond of the house and would be willing to take it off their hands for 10% of the asking price, as long as his wife agreed to certain concessions in their divorce settlement. The wife, being desperate agreed. The moving company arrived in a few days and loaded all the furniture into the truck. The wife and her boyfriend felt relieved that the ordeal was over, but just to spite her husband, they took the curtain rods as well.
The next day his wife entered the house with her new boyfriend, anxious to start her new life. At first everything seemed wonderful but within days an odour began to permeate the air. They rented a steam cleaner and cleaned all the rugs, but the odour got worse. They scrubbed, then painted every wall, even hired an exterminator to fumigate the house and search all the vents and the attic for dead rodents. Nothing seemed to help alleviate the problem and as the odour got worse and worse they decided they would have to sell the house and move. After weeks of seeing potential buyers being offended by the smell, and in spite of reducing the asking price multiple times they decided they had no alternative but to take out a new mortgage for a new house at great expense.
The husband, upon hearing this news told his lawyer that he had always been fond of the house and would be willing to take it off their hands for 10% of the asking price, as long as his wife agreed to certain concessions in their divorce settlement. The wife, being desperate agreed. The moving company arrived in a few days and loaded all the furniture into the truck. The wife and her boyfriend felt relieved that the ordeal was over, but just to spite her husband, they took the curtain rods as well.
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