Uncovered

When I got ready to pay for my purchases of gun powder and bullets,
the cashier said, "Strip down, facing me."

Making a mental note to complain to the National Rifle Association
about gun control wackos, I did as she had instructed. When the
hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided, I found out that she
was referring to how I should place my credit card in the scanner.

I have been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.

They need to make their instructions a little clearer for seniors. I still
don't think I look that bad.